THE OFFICIAL FUNKORELIC MUTHAPAGE!
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About Me: | The P-Funk Mothership-Brothership Connection has now arrived once again lowly earthlings. So Hark n markforward all you fellow Funkateers, Maggot Brains, Funkenstein Clones, Rubber Fans, Freakalenes n Uncle Jams Foot Soldiers. Plus all of U Placebo Syndrome afflicted Gro-Glo-Noses! BEHOLD, I am Funkorelic, I am not of your world. But fear me not, I will do U no harm. Loan me your funky mind n I shall play with it, 4 nothing is good unless U play with it, n all that is good is nasty. Hi there, do not attempt 2 adjust ya sunglasses, there is nothing wrong. I have taken control so as 2 bring U this special pro, U can leave as soon as U R groovin. Welcome 2 nation W.E.F.U.N.K. Better known as WE FUNK, or deeper still THE FUNKORELIC MUTHAPAGE! Home-P of an extraterrestial Funkateer, protector of the Pleasure Principle, n dealer of funky music, P-FUNK, UNCUT FUNK, THE BOMB! Funk upon a time, in the days of the Funkapus, the concept of specially designed Afronauts capable of funkatizing galaxies, was 1st laid on man-child, but was later repossessed n placed among the secrets of the pyramids until a more positive attitude towards this most sacred phenomenon, CLONE FUNK could B acquired. There in these terrestrial projects, it would wait, along with its coinhabitants of kings n pharoahs, like sleeping beauties, 4 the kiss that would release them 2 multiply in the image of the chosen one, Dr FUNKENSTEIN. Now this is what I want U all 2 do, if ya got faults, defects or shortcomings, u know, like arthritis, rheumatism or migraines, whatever part of your body it is, I want ya 2 lay it on your monitor, let the vibes flow through. Funk not only moves, it can re-move, dig? The desired effect is what U get, when U improve ya Interplanetary Funksmanship. Quarks, gluons, red giants, white dwarfs, big bangs. There R 8-billion tales in the naked universe, this is just 1 of them, but they all have black holes. And from the ocean comes a notion that the real eyes lies in rhythm, n the rhythm of vision is a dancer. From the lookin come the seeing, 1 with real eyes realize the rhythm of vision is a dancer, n when he dance, its always on the 1. Going down U can C sounds of silence, primal heartbeats could be seen with the naked eye. The 1 with real eyes realize that - EVERYTHING IS ON THE ONE! So if U will suck my soul, I will lick your funky emotions! I AM Funkorelic, just a creative nuisance, recognizing stupidity as a positive force. A positive funky nuisance. And now Mother Earth is pregnant for the 3rd time, 4 y all have fucked her up. But its not nice 2 fool mother nature. The proud mother of god like all hoes is jealous of her own shadow. Who is this carbon polluted bitch who wished 2 B queen 4 a day? Who would sacrifice the great grandsons n daughters of her jealous mother, by sucking their brains until their ability 2 think was amputated. By pimping their instincts, until they were fat, horny n strung-out. In her neurotic attempt 2 B queen of the universe, who is this bitch? Well I dunno myself, n I have tasted all the maggots in the mind of the universe, but I was not offended, 4 I knew I had 2 rise above it all, or drown in my own shit. Cos the universe is a toll-free toilet. All the mouths are neurological assholes, n psychologically speaking, we are in a state of mental diarrhoea, talking shit a mile a minute. Or in a totally critical condition of constipated ideas that cannot think of nothin but crap. And in this vast milky way of stinky futures n doped-up memories which flood our emotional Funkentelechy when they emerge in our heads 2 which it all just becomes the maggot juice of the mind, please just remember this one thing, Dr Funkenstein has cloned me from the D.N.A. of your earthling actor named Robert Englund, aka as Freddy Kruger, n I am as happy as a monkey with a peanut machine. So if ya all get FUNKY, Then ya all will keep smiling. Yes, I am Funkorelic. I have blue eyes n short brown hair. I am an open-minded sober but crazy individual with an unusual style n taste of what 2 me is funny. I am heavily into FUNK music of the late 60s - mid 70s, but in particular I love the whole PARLIAFUNKADELICMENT THANG! In fact I absolutely love music in general n therefore appreciate most other genres of music too. To the extent that I have a VAST n varied music collection of probably over 50,000 songs, so if there is a particular tune U want, then leave me a private message with the name of the artist + title, n if I have it I will get back 2 U as n when I can. Being such a music fanatic, together with my obviously cool funkyness, artistic flow, insatiable n ravenous sexual appetite n quirky sense of humour, plus given the fact that I am a complete lunatic from outer space, it should go without saying that I think I am a Libran of your zodiac signs, because I certainly have all the traits of a typical, yet unique extraterrestial heterosexual male of this zodiac sign. If U wanna know more then feel free 2 send a message or post a comment here. FUNK IS ITS OWN REWARD SO KISS ME ON MY EGO! SOME FUNKY WEB SITES U MAY OR MAY NOT WANNA VISIT? http://www.funky-stuff.com/bootsy http://yabbers.com/phpbb/index |
Language: | Bad / English / P Funk. |
Interests: | Art / Drama / Learning / Movies / Music / Politics / Psychology / Reading / Sex / Sociology / Study Of UFOs n Other Lifeforms. |
Clubs & Organizations: | http://www.myspace.com/funk_o_relic.com |
Favorite Books: | Chariots Of The Gods by Erich von Daniken / Fingerprints Of The Gods by Graham Hancock / Forbidden History by J.Douglas Kenyon / Frankenstein by Mary Shelly / The 12th Planet by Zecharia Sitchin / + Clancy, Grisham type thrillers. |
Favorite Music: | All Kindz Ov Music. BUT NEVER MIND ME, TO IMPROVE YOUR OWN FUNKENTELECHY PLEASE WATCH THE 53 MINUTE VIDEO DOCUMENTARY OF THE PARLIAFUNKADELICMENT THANG NEAR THE TOP OF THE PAGE! |
Favorite TV Programs: | BO SELECTA / IDEAL / LATER WID JOOLS / SOPRANOS / THE LEAGUE OF GENTLEMEN / 24 / WEEDS |
Favorite Movies: | Magnolia/Pulp Fiction/Quadrophenia/Reservoir Dogs/Starman |
Places I've Traveled To: | Planet Earth |
I'm Looking For: | First & foremost: A new sexy female soulmate. And also any other FUNKATEERS, MAGGOT BRAINS OR BOOTY SNATCHERS! Plus any and all of U gorgeous n HOT BOOTYLICIOUS females all over this planet aged 16+ for just some friendship, or whatever else U should desire! |
Education
High School: |
Dating
Sexual Orientation: | Straight |
Dating Status: | Single |
Body Type: | Average |
Eye Color: | Blue | Height: | 5'7" |
Smoking Habit: | social |
Drinking Habit: | no |
Religion: | Agnostic |
Interested in Meeting for: | Dating, Serious Relationship |
Currently Living with: | Alone |
In a social setting, I'm: | The life of the party, Flirt, Comic Relief |
TV watching habits: | News Junkie, Sitcoms, Dramas, Movies, Documentaries |
Sense of humor: | Friendly, Clever / Quick Witted, Dry / Sarcastic, Slapstick, Obscure, Raunchy |
Guestbook:
Derby
United Kingdom
Derby
United Kingdom
Nottingham
United Kingdom
Derby
United Kingdom
Nottingham
United Kingdom
Derby
United Kingdom
Derby
United Kingdom
Derby
United Kingdom
Derby
United Kingdom
United Kingdom
1) $100.00 to do it on the grass.
2) $200.00 to do it on a couch.
3) $300.00 to do it in the bed.
In the morning a British bloke walks in and slaps a $100 note on the table. So they went out and did it on the grass.
Soon, an American fellow walks in and slaps a $200 note on the table. So they head
for the couch and did it there.
About the end of the day, a Jamaican man walks in and slaps $300 on the table. Happy from seeing the money the prostitute says, "Wow,...you have class".
The Jamaican responds, "Class mi rass ... three times pon the grass."
Salford
United Kingdom
Derby
United Kingdom
Derby
United Kingdom
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